No, I am not getting married. In fact this post has nothing to do with weddings really. It was just some thoughts I had on the walk home tonight that seemed to fall into each of these categories, but not exactly in the correct order.
I was glancing into windows today as I walked home (not pausing and staring mind you, simply looking as I passed by) and I thought about how much I have always liked looking in people's homes, seeing them cooking or playing games or gathering on the balcony for a party. I swear I am not a peeping tom. I don't go up to windows to see people specifically. I am not looking for someone naked or in a compromising position. I just like to pass by and glance, sort of like dropping in for a moment and borrowing their lives. Does this make sense? Typing it out it sounds creepy.
I guess, I just like imagining lives that are different than mine. How they work. What their experiences are. People who have flan as a favorite dessert, or who wash their clothes every tuesday. . . I suppose that's why I like books so much and documentaries. It's probably also why the reality tv shows I enjoy so much are things like Little People Big World and House of Tiny Terrors or Supernanny.
The idea of borrowing other people's lives reminded me of something I said to my friend Chris last year. I was talking about how hard February always is for me. How sad and depressed I am. He asked me why February was so hard (apparently a good question)and the best explanation I could give him was: "It's a new year and I'm the same me," Somehow December comes with its traditions and family and safety and then January with it's blank white page of fresh hope and then February hits and its blatantly obvious that no matter how hard I try, I have my same problems, my same failings and my same struggles.
Anyway, those are my thoughts for today. I have to go call my sister and wish her a happy birthday now :)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
February will no long be your least favorite month - my BIRTHDAY IS IN FEBRUARY, as well as Mardi Gras and lots of 1/2 priced chocolate.
If none of that appeals to you, be thankful that February is the shortest month :)
Also, you can always remember that you met me in February, and if that doesn't cheer you up, then I don't know what will.
When I was a kid, I used to pretend when I was out walking the dog that I was a stranger walking the streets. If it was night time, I would look into the other homes and wonder how their lives worked. When I got to my house, I would 'decide' to go in to it...like I was peeking into another person's world. Sometimes I would stand there in the doorway, observing until someone noticed me. Thankfully, I didn't daydream so drastically that I ever went into anyone elses' home but my own...but I did fantasize about doing it.
Not creepy, just imaginative.
Post a Comment